extreme measures.

read 'dinosaur comics' because they are awesome, assholes.

It's Tuesday Again

And I'm in a fucking bad mood and need to do something fun tonight to remedy that. You fuckers better come through for me, or there will retribution of the highest order brought down on you.

Oh, the things i'm gonna *DO* for my country...and by "do", i mean "Have sex with", and by "things", i mean women...

So i just finished downloading the pulse-pounding sequel to the seminal work, XXX. The sequel, XXX2: State of the Union, stars Ice Cube, as opposed to its' original actor. I suggest a group viewing, ASAP. Anyone game?


Fun Fact: Vin Diesel and director Rob Cohen signed on for this film two months before the original opened. Both ended up leaving the project.

Oh God we're nerds

I wonder how long we can keep posting about Star Wars?

You bumped into me (Jar Jar) while we were waiting on line. I was surprised to see that you were actually decent looking (a rarity amongst Star Wars fans), and I smiled and said, "Meeza so happy to see you suh!" You looked like you were about to say something back when Anakin stepped in between us and gave me a nasty look. You need to ditch that loser, can't you see that he's mean spirited? He's just going to cheat on you and break your heart.

Holla back and maybe you'll get to see my special light saber. Once you go Gungan, you can't go back.

P.S. You should really stop smoking, think about what you're doing to Luke and Leia.

From craigslist.

strike the empire back.

it has been more than a month since swrpg went on hiatus, and i think i've got a solution. rather than running drawn out, campaign-style adventures, i've pieced together a series of 'one shots' that can be attended by anyone without a great deal of pre-planning. the idea being, were some one to cancel, we would just play without them. this requires a slight shift in our era of play, however. inspired by the military operation of the clone wars in 'episode three,' i'm going to move the campaign forward to the clone wars era, and all of you will be jedi within. you have two options: keep your old character and play with 'aging' rules (these involve minuses to str and dex balanced by pluses to int and wis), or make an entirely new character (with better information about the nature of the game than you had when we started the first time). anyway, i have a few of these mini-adventures mapped out, and i'd like to give them a go. i'm targeting next tuesday (after we return from milford) as the starting point. all games will be run in hampden.

lemme know what'ch'yall think.

gentlemen, start your browsers.

right. i've got a sizeable challenge for our small, rag-tag band of web-users. finding 'the phantom edit.' between feez's strange 'friends,' klemis ability to find information vaguely applicable to a situation and my ability to give blowjobs, we should be able to do it. lucas couldn't have destroyed every copy of the thing...could he have? this is what we need to find out. i have a 'reward' for the person who reels this one in.

Help help

While you guys are I guess living the dream I am browsing the Transchoptankia Gazette, your basic idiot-on-the-Eastern-Shore armed with a blog. The funny part is he is actually a local political appointee about to get fired because of said blog.

Well, okay, it's not really that funny but I'll take what I can get.

scum and villany.

somehow, while google image searchin' 'brazillian girls' (fuck, the results were awesome), i stumbled upon this gem:

10 TRUTHS WHITE AND BLACK PEOPLE KNOW, BUT MEXICAN
PEOPLE WON'T ADMIT:
1. Hickey's are not attractive.
2. Chicken is a food, not a roommate.
3. Jesus is not a name for your son.
4. Your country's flag is not a car decoration.
5. Maria is a name but not for every other daughter.
6. "Jump out and run" is not in any insurance policies.
7. 10 people to a car is considered too many.
8. Buttoning just the top button of your shirt is a bad fashion statement.
9. Mami and Papi can't possibly be the nickname of every person in your family.
10.Letting your children run wildly through the store is not normal.

note the highlighted number four.

awesome.

Just a little bit of history repeating...

As per usual, there are awesome shows coming up soon.

As per usual, I will inform you about them.

As per usual, I will be in attendance by myself.

As per usual, I will have told you so.

Showtimes are as follows:

Friday, May 20th: The Talking Head Club, Baltimore, MD, featuring 'Celebrations', who have recently been signed to 4AD and recorded an excellent record which only Vijay has heard. Also, I work with the drummer, and the singer was featured in the TV on the Radio single 'Staring at the Sun'

Friday, May 27th: Ram's Head Live, Annapolis, MD, featuring 'Brazillian Girls'
I will not be in attendance, as Ram's Head is too far to try to make it after work on Friday night, but you might go.

If you have the testicular fortitude (with respect to the Rock), then you should join me in New York City on Wednesday, June 1st, to see the Brazillian Girls in what is, in fact, their home town, and in a much hipper venue. Of course, I don't expect to see any of you pussies. I do expect to have an enormous grin on my face when they play "Pussy".

Friday, June 3rd: Sonar, Baltimore, MD, featuring "the Futureheads" of Burnout3 fame. You know, the weird one that starts "This is a brand new problem. A problem without any clues." I have the record. It is excellent. I'm sure you'ld never know it if I didn't tell you.

Also, the new (as in 2004) Q and Not U record is awesome. Really, really good.

Get tickets in advance, stupid. We clearly all have the internet, and credit cards.

paging the Nerdcore Guild...

so, does anyone happen to own 'episode ii?' i know fishel has ep. i and the fancy special versions of iv-vi, so methinks it is just ii we're after...

Remember when you guys were all political?

Those were some good times. I found a speech by Bill Moyers that's mostly about public media but also talks about what's going on with the media in general, and it echoes a lot of what I guess we talked about before everything went to shit in 2004.

Mermin also quotes public television’s Jim Lehrer, whom I greatly respect, acknowledging that unless an official says something is so, it isn’t news. Why were journalists not discussing the occupation of Iraq? “Because,” says Jim Lehrer, “the word ‘occupation’ was never mentioned in the run up to the war. Washington talked about the war as a war of liberation, not a war of occupation. So as a consequence, those of us in journalism,” says Lehrer, “never even looked at the issue of occupation.” “In other words,” says Jonathan Mermin, “if the government isn’t talking about it, we don’t report it.”

It blows my mind that Jim Lehrer admits he's a sucker for the party line.

'the listserv'

sure, my e-tenticles don't trawl as deep as klemis', but at least i can guarantee this won't be boring.

Tuesday Madness!

It's Tuesday; what shall we do?

Echo Base to Yavin 4...

Operation "TCW-Acquire" is complete. Please advise.

Here I am blathering some more

While you guys are salivating over the Freudian implications of a man who wields a two-ended lightsaber, I found this really cool thing. You know that Wikipedia thing? This lets you make your own tiny version of it that you can edit and save at will. Also it has spiffy animations. Here's a tutorial.

Yeah, okay, I'm boring.

Also Known As:
Blue Harvest (USA) (fake working title)

BURKE! STATUS!

here's all y'alls' itenerary:

day 1.
thursday, may 19th.

9:30am. gather at yavin 4. coffee and bagels for all.

10:00am: Episode I: The Phantom Menace (runtime: 133 minutes)

12:35pm: short break. pizza order placed at this juncture.

1:00pm: Episode II: Attack of the Clones (runtime: 144 minutes)

3:30pm: The Clone Wars (animated micro-series)

6:00pm: disperse with the intention of reconvening near 'the senator' to appraise situation on the ground. first cocktails of the day consumed.

10:00pm: Episode III: Revenge of the Sith (runtime: 140 minutes)

12:40pm: leave 'the senator' for yavin 4.

1:30am: Episode IV: A New Hope (runtime: 125 minutes)

3:35am: DAY 1 CONCLUDES. yavin 4, a fully equipped outpost, can accomodate anyone man enough to continue the adventure.

day 2.
friday, may 20th.

c. 12:00pm: Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back (runtime: 129 minutes)

c. 3:00pm: Episode VI: Return of the Jedi (runtime: 135 minutes)

c. 6:00pm: the saga concludes...?

c. 12:45am: our minds a delirious collision of lightsabers and fist-weilded energy swords, we collapse into one anothers' arms and explore the homoerotic fantasies we've always concealed under layers of science-fiction warfare.

This one's for us county boys

... all two of us. But maybe the rest of you would find a realtime Google traffic map of the city useful anyway.

Poker To-Nite

8:00, my place.

A poor showing, indeed...

I can't describe my disappointment upon visiting the Jerk Store, and finding that today's specials include:

1. A mention of a video game which obviously would have existed somewhere.

2. An invitation which clearly should have gone out under e-vites, and not the blog.

3. Some boring shit that Klimas posted, for some reason.

So the rest of you don't loose faith in the Blog all together, here is my offering for the day. I'm sure you will find, as I did, that this is a far more interesting subject.

Please excuse my not mailing this — but I don't know your new address

I was blinded by a terrific silver-white flash — I had to look away. Wherever I looked an enormous purple splotch appeared: it was just as bright when I closed my eyes. "That," said my scientific brain to my befuddled one, "is an after-image caused by looking at a bright light — it is not the bomb you are looking at." So I turned back to look at the bomb.

Excerpts from Richard Feynman's letters.

Now there's a MMO for everything!

All of you should get online and play Shot Online. It's by korean developers, it's a golf MMORPG, and it's chock full of engrish. What could be better?

guns and chicks: a formula for one week success.

all:

i must dine with my mom and sister this evening, as this is my sister's last night in town. this will most likely make me late for the 'creative' 'festivities,' scheduled to commence at 8.00. i trust i have given you a solid starting point, and expect a fully 'fleshed' out script when i get home. h'oh, man. that's good.

Because uncompressed video and sound is freakin' big...

You should buy a bigger harddrive. And now's a great time. Outpost.com has a Seagate 300 Gigabyte UATA Hard Drive for $115 after a 40 dollar rebate. That's a crazy deal. Me, i'm buying 2. Gonna bring the media PC up to a terabyte of space.

These stats be off the chain, yo...

Whatever the vernacular is now, it's rare that i see a console that has a potential to do everything right right out of the gate. XBOX 360 might do just that.

presumably, this does not mean a naked gwenyth paltrow...

holy shit:

Christensen also confirmed recently that Lucas got a helping hand with the script for Revenge of the Sith. In an interview with Playboy, he said the rumours about playwright Tom Stoppard working on the dialogue for the film are true.

Stoppard, known for stage works like Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead, gave the Lucas-penned screenplay a more "human" dimension, Christensen said.

Me and Bobby and Jackie...

In a further blurring of the line between guilty pleasure and actual pleasure, the Futureheads, of Crash and Smash virtual fame, will be playing an actual show at an actual (almost) venue in the somewhat surreal city of Baltimore, MD in the romanticized month of June.

I, for one, would love to settle the score between who's the bigger geek: the gamer or the hipster. Since some of you dance dorks will likely be at this particular sorta-kinda venue anyway, you might be more willing to cough up the lousy fifteen bucks for admission. Or just cry for hours that you can't pay too much for drinks, dance to the same boring shit, and hang out with ecstasy-crazed tween models till 4:oo in the morning. Not that the show wouldn't be like that anyway. You just have to pay to get in, you cheap bastards.

Why they couldn't have played anywhere but Sonar is fucking beyond me. Must be an industry thing. Their next show on the tour is at the 9:30 club.

Baltimore 48-Hour

Is indeed happening. Are we going to take the other teams to school, or just tell the whole thing to shove itself somewhere unpleasant?

Check it.

Important Safety Information

A lightsaber is not a toy! Keep it out of reach of children at all times. Lightsaber locks are required in most states.

There are two ends to any lightsaber -- one end has the belt ring, while the other end houses the blade arc tip and blade emitter. NEVER point the blade emitter of a lightsaber toward your own body. NEVER look down the "barrel" of a lightsaber, even if you are "sure" it is in safe mode. If you accidentally activate the lightsaber, serious injury could result.

"Put a tiger in your MAC", or something stupid like that.

Yo all, we just got a copy of the new Mac OSX 10.4 (Codename: Tigerpants) at the office. Anyone want a copy of it?

Plans and how to plan them...

I wanted to review a few general impressions regarding the date of the 19th of May, more commonly referred to as "The day our dreams were dashed forever".

I seem to recall a mention of assemblage around the morning hours, in order to view the first and second episodes of the Star Wars saga, to be followed by a theatrical viewing of the third episode. The question is:

What time shall we assemble, and what time will we go to see the movie at the 2nd location?

Fiveish? Sevenish? Laterish?

'but i confess i am as yet unfamiliar with the duck hunt genre'

there is something endlessly hilarious about awkward syntax and canned comics.

see also.

from now on, you'll all be in (the frame of) my heart.

because no matter how far apart you stand, the canon 3x zoom xl 3.4-10.2mm lens will reduce all of your faults to a smooth 24 frames per second.

video games haven't killed you...yet.

cnt time again.

who the fuck is in charge here?

whoever maintained control of the blog after the great calamity: eeen would like to join us. his user name is 'triskadelphia.' his email is ian@jesandian.com. some one make it happen.

It's Tuesday!

What manner of cock-measurey should we engage in this week?

mozilla firefox is awesome while you unfortunates are not.

in the chris harring tradition of resisting popular transitional technology (see: 'mac daddy: how the macintosh computer won chris harring's heart') before suddenly embracing it then lecturing everyone he knows about said technology's, and therefore his own, superiority, i bring you FIREFOX! i will now make graphic insinuations about your sexual tendencies.

good day.

(or is that the matt fishel tradition? i always get the two confused.)

Even bus drivers get to play video games

There's the bark of air brakes, then the unmistakable sound of breaking glass.

An instructor at the right elbow of a Metrobus driver sighs and says, "Man, you keep laying that pedestrian out over there."

Let's Hitchhike It, Boys

It opens tonight, and I plan to see it. Who's with me? It is not playing at the Senator, but everywhere else, more or less.

A word of warning

When police and inspectors get to the second floor, they find about 40 tournament players, caught off guard by the invasion.

“This is a raid,” one officer says, “We’re going to detain everyone briefly, talk to a few people, and then we’ll let you leave.” A woman at the bar bursts into tears, but an older man comforts her, saying, “Don’t worry, you’re not going to jail. Relax.”

The chief liquor inspector's on the warpath, boys.

Darth you da bomb... keep up the great work

The probe droids have detected an illegal settlement.

Mood: optimistastic!

There is a bit of bounce in my step today, notwithstanding the fact that all the diodes down the left side of my leg seem finally to be functioning smoothly. I ate a full breakfast in my hyperbaric chamber while listening to really loud music (Qui'hut Xillermott's Sonata No.26) and then popped out to tour the bridge.

It's sort of funny, but not as good as it could be. The comments are cool, though.

New Conveniently small size actually fits in your living room!

There it is boys, the new xbox. Discuss.

australia's like, 'wtf, mates?'

i take back what i said about the future of flash animation. who needs all that sleek, refined intellectualism when there's an alternative?

we got poped!

from the the bbc:

At the age of 14, he joined the Hitler Youth, as was required of young Germans of the time, but was not an enthusiastic member.

It may be worth noting...

Our usual playing spot, at which we ignore the fact that we ever played Star Wars, or any sort of card-based time-passings, may well be unavailable to us at this juncture. I offer up Feez's new apartment as an alternative, so that we might ruin it.

Failing that, who wants to play Halo on the big screen?

do you know which day the 'one week' contest ends?

you have two guesses.

p.s. klemis, might we please put a redstar link on crunchable, if there is not already one there?

x6 film challenge.

as team philly (bolstered by team baltimore) failed to be randomly selected for a slot in the philly film challenge, our joined forces were left to their own devices. it took until late saturday afternoon, but we devised a refreshingly non-slamm-oriented mission for ourselves. 6 filmmakers wrote a one-line concept on a slip of paper, dropped it in a hat, and away we went. 6 one-minute films in 1.25 of a weekend. a slight catch: each film must seque from the film before it and into the film after it. alex, a young'un from kutztown u., is the first to fully edit his film based on a concept submitted by yours truly: 'an immortal being receives a visit/phone call from an angry/violent person.' please view it here at your earlier convenience. (as i did not direct or write it, i can assure you it is work-safe).

-the link doesn't seem to be working, but if you type www.jesandian.com/movies/dracula.mov in your browser, you'll get some quality short filmmaking action ed.

why fuck with tradition?

why would we play swrpg tonite?

alas, i was scheduled to record more voice-over for 'gangbang the filchaks' this evening. and i must edit the 'x6filmchallenge' shorts...details in subsequent post.

SO 519: Advanced Pop Mythology

class is about to be in session, fuckers. my official coursebook show ep. iii premiering may 19th. as you are aware, this situation demands watching episodes i and ii, followed by the clone wars microseries, followed by a trip to the senator theater to see episode three, followed by a return trip to hampden to watch episodes iv-vi. daunting? of course. all y'all got more than a full month to tactfully ask for two vacation/personal/sick days on thursday (19) and friday (20). the beautiful part is you then have a full weekend to shower yourselves clean.

Get yr pitchforks

Bloggers Pitch Fits Over Glitches

Steamed Hams

Ok, going to see Steamboy tonight at 7:30, as well should the rest of you. I mean, how often in life can you say you saw the most expensive film of a genre ever made?*





*More often than you think.

Google is watching you...

So apparently the latest addition to Google Maps is a "satellite" button, which you can use to view your directions as pictures from a satellite, as opposed to just a boring old map. Kindof kitch, kindof neat.

tuesdays are for...

...cancelling star wars! tonite's reasons include:

1. screening of 'dyke squad' at afi silver theater in washington d.c., drawing kara and fishel from the fold.

2. c. harring lending his vocal talents to the highly anticipated 'fuck the filchacks.'

Wikipædia

The most thorough April Fool's joke I've seen, anyway.

FeEz in the big city...

So it's official, i'm moving to Mt. Vernon sometime during the month of May. Got me a kickass apartment on the corner of reed and park, right above Anne's apartment. CH and joel, this is the apartment i was talking about on the way to the poker game. So, anyone want to help me figure out how to get my matress up a two-story spiral staircase?

This is kind of scary

Who knew they were so resiliant?

Apropos

A call to action

1. WHEREAS Feezer himself has admitted that the current blog layout is an unreadable mess, I have created a new stylesheet. I have used the dearly departed Poker Tome as a testing ground for it. I hope that through popular acclaim Feezer will be enjoined to use said stylesheet in Our Present Blog.

2. WHEREAS I've got nothing to do tonight, anyone want to play Munchkin?

a good day for updates.

yessiree. set yourself up with a swing past toothpastefordinner (drew's most ambitious work to date), then mcswny's dropeth the boom.

A fierce legislative battle in NJ

Then came the Trenton Fruit Showdown of 2003, a legislative battle for most-favored-fruit status between supporters of the renowned Jersey tomato and those of the highbush blueberry. In the end, the blueberry lobby, a loose but surprisingly fierce coalition of South Jersey farmers and Brick Township fourth graders (they were studying state government), proved stronger, and last year Governor James McGreevey signed into law a bill acknowledging New Jersey’s first-ever state fruit: “Whereas, blueberries taste good. . . . Whereas, New Jersey is widely recognized as the blueberry capital of the nation. . . . Be it enacted . . .”

Blogging blows...

At least sometimes it does on this site....given the huge transaction times, triple-posting of comments (see joel's response to CH's last post), and such, i'm thinking of alternatives for hosting The Jerk Store. Anyone know of any other good bloggy-type sites?

I'm also not averse to throwing up a webserver and running a BBS system, a la invision, or something like that. I've got extra hardware out the wazoo, so throwing together a cheap server box would be cake. Klimas, i may need your help with some back-end work though, if we go that route.

Let me know what you guys think.

provided this post appears on the blog within the next 46 hours...

we will be playing swrpg tonite. take a few moments, you know, during your lunch break or something, to review the events of the last adventure in your head and formulate a plan for what your character would do. please.

Here's your ammo, liberal soldiers

The Washington Post reports that 73% of stories on Fox News [bugmenot] include some editorializing by the anchor or reporter. Examples include:

Last March, Fox reporter Todd Connor said that "Iraq has a new interim constitution and is well on its way to democracy."

"Let's pray it works out," said anchor David Asman.

The executive producer fires back: "They're, number one, Americans, and number two, human beings, as well as journalists."

Here's the thing: the whole Fox vs. CNN (or whatever news source you personally believe in -- the study quoted in the article doesn't mention the BBC) debate reminds me a lot of the 2000 presidential election, in the sense that in choosing between the two things offered to you misses an essential point, that there is something better out there.

In other news, newspaper stories only included anonymous sources 7% of the time -- down from 29% in 2003.

you want awesome webcomics, do-ya?

check the fuck out of this. don't be fooled by the f-bomb, this job is totally work safe and scott mccloud-recommended.

Stop being bored at work...

And go read Death Note.

why hasn't klemis posted on the blog lately?

or...

the obvious sequel to the previous two posts

or...

retardo.

What the fuck?

So who was supposed to call me last night and tell me things were cancelled?

A moment's peace in the war of the stars...

So in case CH didn't get to one of you, there's no SWRPG tonight. Fishel can't make it, due to some band-thing, so we're postponing it. Don't show up at my house. i won't be there. And don't break in if i'm not there. I have nothing you want.

Now then. That said, i'm going to go back to trying to hack my way out of the classroom network.

space camp.

itunes recommended a fine album to me this morning, entitled 'spaced out: the very best of leonard nimoy and william shatner.' yes, we all know bill's antics from countless 'priceline' commercials, but nimoy? who knew?

---

a quick google image search proves i may be behind the times on this one, however.

Everything2 is the [new|old] Wikipedia

Everything2's pretty much like Wikipedia, only it's not specifically an encyclopedia and the links between things are much weirder and possibly intuitive. It's been around a lot longer, too, so there's a lot more to read.

Interesting starting points:

• blackjack
• Holy Frijoles
• you can learn a lot about someone at an airport

Joel Haddock, DO NOT read this post.

So apparently KoTOR2 wasn't nearly a complete game when it came out. Some dude went through the audio files, and there's at least 3 more endings/pieces of endings that were cut from the game, but they never took the data out of the game. Give it a look see.

Let's Win $50,000

Seriously.

Possessing Barbie

“The difference is because we were alone and you were beginning to know my mind. I wasn’t just an avatar.” she said. “I was a person.”

“I think it reminded me of something that happened for real once.” I said. “It’s the only way I can explain having real physiological responses. I mean, like embarrassment and heart rate and god, the guilt.”

“Ha, I win!” she typed.

“But you can only win if it's a game.” I said.

"It is time to put an end to this militia."

the u.n. was all like, 'what?' and the militia dudes were like, 'fuck you.' and the u.n. was like, 'speak up, we couldn't hear you,' as they loaded their guns and got these huge fucking missle-cannons out. and the militia dudes were like, 'y'all pussies!' and the u.n. was like, 'nice knowing you,' and totally fucking blew these dudes away.

It's amazing what people throw out these days...

Dumpster diving. The new geek subculture.

How Shall We Nerd?

Are we Star Warsin' tonight?

Here at our show, we like to verbally fellate the president at any given opportunity...

God, i so love Fox News...

Science!

Russian scientists have developed a product that can keep a person drunk, Britain’s Daily Telegraph wrote.

The tablet called RU-21 Red was developed in Spirit Sciences, a laboratory based in California but with research facilities in Russia. The same scientists had earlier worked on secret programs for the Kremlin and had made the famous RU-21 product that cures hangovers.

[full story]

Fun fact for the day:

The Mexican voice actor for Homer Simpson makes $54.00 an episode.

The Enquirer is obsolete

Here on the Internet, we get our pointless celebrity gossip from the source (not safe for work). Some dweeb hacked Paris Hilton's cell phone/PDA and posted the contents. Looks real to me... um, I mean, people prank-called people in address book succesfully.

Metafilter reacts to this like the bunch of guilty Internet liberals they are.

r.i.p., eeen's involvement with marc's film.

ah, did the blood ever splatter. details will be provided verbally, or perhaps in essay form. on a marginally related note, swrpg will likely be postponed to allow us to pick up an easy win over philly in the baltimore v. philly weekly film challenge. anyone that wants to assist in a evening-long filmmaking effort is encouraged to do so immediately.

Klimas's golf post was oddly ill-timed...

R.I.P. Hunter S. Thompson, 1937-2005.

I guess you could say i'm, "Alone in the Dark"...

Right, so i've got Uwe Boll's latest masterpiece sitting on my hard drive. We should all watch it at some point. Right now, it's only a cam, so the quality's not all that super (content aside), but i'm looking for a better copy at the moment. I'll let you know what i find.

Adaptable HTML

Klimas and/or Joel, is there any way to make the HTML code in the template adaptable to different screen resolutions? I've got my monitor at work at 1280 by 1024, and the blog just seems kindof silly looking as a stripe of text down the middle of the screen...

Last Day?

Klimas, this is your last day at MPT right? How will you make your grand exit? I suggest something involving the set pieces from Bob the Vid Kid...

i, robot

The R Peed unit was suddenly at his side, holding his wrist. "Please take care not to harm this citizen, Detective."

Arturo snarled. He wasn't strong enough to break the robot's grip, and he couldn't order it to let him rattle the punk, but the second law had lots of indirect applications. "Go patrol the lakeshore between High Park and Kipling," he said, naming the furthest corner he could think of off the top.

The R Peed unit released him and clicked its heels. "It is my pleasure to do you a service," and then it was gone, bounding away on powerful and tireless legs.

Full story

What would Solid Snake do?

He'd get the hell out of there, that's what he'd do.

"...being that a lot of people in the mood to play golf are also in the mood to shoot something..."

this is the kind of thing i would expect from hunter s. thompson. but bill murray? uh...yeah, him too.

FeEz in NYC!

So i went to the Christo exhibit in central park on saturday. It was pretty damn cool...not to mention it was the first time i've been to NYC. Had a lot of fun, and made great time getting to/from there. Pictures forthcoming.

death by dishonor.

klemis, i've failed you. in my paltry defense, friday and saturday were added as shooting days for this dang-blasted film, nudging my weekend total to 32 hours. 32 FUCKING HOURS.

Over Time

This is beautiful.

Reverse masher... masheress...?

A Japanese phrasebook on sex... I think. Not work-safe, but here are some tidbits if you somehow ended up having to put in an appearance instead of working in your jammies like always:

"Isn't your boyfriend's like this?"

"Nope. Completely different. It's so different it's hard to believe you're both human males."

...

"Is this also the first time you've been touched here?"

...

"Rumble, clickety-clack."

"All aboard. Here we go."

"Toot, toot. Chug, chug."

fanfare, anyone?

for those of you who pay close attention to the news, you probably missed this development in the race for dnc chair, arguably the key figure in mapping long-term strategy for the democratic party. i know 'the baltimore sun' took care to bury the story on page 5.

Let's put you down for #7, #9... and a little bit of #10

The top ten geekiest hobbies.

Mapquest sucks

Well, it has for a long time. Google just came out with its own service... and it's better! At least more fun. You can drag around the map on the fly and zooming in seems much faster.

You Need Not Be Tainted Forever

From the Jedi Counselor:

Q: Please clarify the core rulebook's statement that, when gaining a Force Point, a tainted character instead reduces his Dark Side Point total by one. Does this mean that a tainted character may not gain Force Points (except when advancing a level), or does it mean a tainted character can choose to lose a Dark Side Point instead of gaining a Force Point?

A: It means the latter. The sacrifice of a Force Point to lose a Dark Side Point is a choice; it's not automatic.

I'm sensing a powerful mind, Captain

In honor of Enterprise's cancellation, I present to you the first draft of the first episode of Next Generation's first episode, "Encounter at Farpoint":

Picard takes another beat to study him carefully, then:



                           PICARD

           One further thing... a special

           favor I have to ask of you.



                           RIKER

           Anything, sir.



                           PICARD

           Using the same kind of strength

           you showed with Captain DeSoto,

           I'd appreciate it if you can keep

           me from making an ass of myself

           with children.



                           RIKER

           Sir?



                           PICARD

           I'm not a family man, Riker, and

           yet, Starfleet has given me a ship

           with children aboard.



                           RIKER

                   (nods)

           Yes, sir. And families...



                           PICARD

           And I don't feel comfortable with

           children. But, since a captain

           needs an image of "geniality"

           toward the little monsters, you're

           to see that's exactly what I

           project.



                           RIKER

           Aye, sir.

Serious political discussion

"And to the Iranian people, I say tonight: As you stand for your own liberty, America stands with you."

vs.

"There is another way for the bloodshed to stop and that is for the Iraqi military and the Iraqi people to take matters into their own hands to force Saddam Hussein the dictator to step aside."

Hmm...

Even though you fuckers don't deserve it....

I'll have presents for you all tonight!